Since Thanksgiving has come and gone, naturally my thoughts have been about the blessings I see in my life. In the last few weeks, I have been mostly grateful for medical doctors. I felt like writing this post because I think that the medical community can get a bad rap at times. I hear people grumble about how their doctor overlooked something and their child got really sick, or that doctors are just out to get our money, etc. And all of these stories are probably true. But I think our family has been especially fortunate to find good, conscientious doctors. It started with our OB doctor I decided on when we found out we were expecting Caleb. Today, almost seven years later our little group of medical professional support now includes a neurologist, pediatrician and orthopedist. It's experiences like the OB catching a potentially life threatening condition I developed when I was 38 weeks pregnant, to a doctor who was observant enough in his questioning me about Jake's seizures. Through his questioning we realized that one side of Jake's body seemed to be more affected than the other and that it just wasn't a sickness-related seizure--this helped in leading us to get certain tests that perhaps we might have thought were unnecessary.
And these past few weeks, I have been reminded again why I am grateful for good doctors. I had asked my OB (the same one since Caleb's birth) about my pelvis, back and hip pain that I have been experiencing and she immediately referred me to a good orthopedist who got me in that day. This orthopedist has helped me cope with my pain, helped me learn what activities I can and can't do and has helped me with exercises that have even helped improve my condition. A condition I read would only be resolved postpartum and for the meantime I thought I was just going to have to put up with it. I'm grateful she was insistent that I not be put on bedrest because she felt it was better to work around the problem and strengthen my body so that I would have a better recovery. And my OB has been helping with the condition suggesting certain things I should try that I was probably a little too stubborn to try without her encouragement because I thought it wouldn't work, but in the end it did.
I know this may seem like a funny post, it doesn't seem to be related to our family much, but really it is. It is because of good doctors that Jake has been seizure free for over seven months, that I am now not on bedrest and can get through most days without too much pain and discomfort and help take care of the kids. It is because of a good doctor that Caleb and I may be alive today since most doctors wouldn't have run the type of tests she ran. She determined my blood platelets were dropping and I could have bled to death during Caleb's delivery if she didn't act soon.
And one last thing, of course it isn't just good doctors that helped us through all these medical related trying times. It's family and community/church support that have also helped pull us through. Family and friends have helped with childcare and emotional support when we needed it. It would be terribly lonely to try and face all of this alone, but fortunately, we don't have to.
Monday, November 29, 2010
Sunday, October 31, 2010
First Day of School
Obviously, I am out of order on my posts here, but oh well! I thought by quitting my job with BYU-Idaho I was going to have oodles of time on my hands, but nope! Mike started his AirMed training and then was gone for two weeks to D.C., so no oodles of time, not even really any spare time lately, but that's okay. It does make me wonder how I ever worked and took care of the kids, but then Mike was home more, that's probably how I did it.
Let me start with Jake and Caleb's first days of school. Caleb is in first grade this year and has Miss Eliason. She is very sweet and kind and Caleb seems to like her. He is getting bored at times and seems to catch on to things rather swiftly. He gets a little frustrated that everything they are going over right now is stuff he has already learned. And for most students, I am sure they need the review--but Caleb seems to have this uncanny gift for remembering everything he sees, hears or reads and has just taken off with reading. I am continually amazed, humbled, grateful and in awe of his ability to recognize words that I don't think he should know like "veterinarian." He also has a knack for math. My challenge as his parent is to make sure he stays stimulated and interested in school so that he doesn't become lazy. As a former teacher I completely understand having to teach to the middle level of the class. And when you have over 26 students, how do you meet each child's needs? I've been pondering over this dilemma lately and am not sure what we will do for him, but for now, even though he gets a little frustrated that he knows most of what is being taught, he seems to thrive on the social aspect of school. He loves being with his friends and just being in the whole school environment.
Now, let's move on to Jake. He started preschool this year and seems to be doing well. He is beginning to recognize letters and numbers and enjoys going two days a week. Lately, he is absorbing the sign language the teacher is using. I think what is best about preschool is that Jake feels a little more grown-up and has his "own" thing that is not Caleb's or Michaela's. It's just for him. He is making friends outside of his family and that makes him feel more independent and important, too.
On to Michaela, you may laugh at this, but the single biggest accomplishment for her (and for me!) is that she is finally potty-trained. I know she isn't even three yet, and for those readers that are wondering why I say, "finally" it is because she initiated potty training well over a year ago and has stopped and started and made more messes on our carpet than Caleb, Jake and the dog combined! That is not exaggerating. I was happy to wait until she was past her third birthday, but she has gone through spurts of insisting on wearing underwear and then not wanting, to taking off her diaper, peeing on the floor, sometimes using the toilet sometimes just going in her diaper, then wanting underwear back on and so it has gone. And to those of you older women that told me that girls are supposed to be so much easier just flat out lied to me! I am a little bitter at you, ya know. My boys were sooooooooooooo much easier. And trying how to teach her not to get urine all over the seat and on the floor while she sits, yea, that has also thrown out the theory that boys make the toilet more messy, too.
Well, in spite of our struggle to potty train, it has probably made the victory that much more sweet because it has been a long road to travel.
Okay, what next, we have covered all the kids, perhaps you would like to hear how Mike is doing? He is loving AirMed, no surprise there. He got a little behind passing off training stuff when he went to D.C. for a two week HazMat course at the National Fire Academy, but he is about to pass everything off this next week and I know he will be very relieved when that gets done. I am very grateful that he is very motivated with his career and takes it very seriously and works extremely hard at what he does. I think he is fantastic at what he does. Sandy City Fire has also had some changes in the department and a few engineer slots have opened up. Hopefully, Mike will be able to promote in the next few months. We are not holding our breath--I am trying to say this politically correct here, let's just say the department seems to change their promotion policies and procedures more times than my daughter changes clothes in a day. Okay, that wasn't politically correct, but they haven't exactly been consistent over the time that Mike has been with them. Mike is very patient, however, and continues to work hard, and it will happen.
And last, we found out our fourth child will be a girl. Mike came up with the name "Emily Kathryn." It seems to fit, and that will probably be her name when she comes. She is growing well and so far we haven't had any complications. My pelvis began to separate during the last four weeks of Michaela's pregnancy and I was told this might be a problem again. It seems to have started in the last few weeks. I hope to continue doing core strengthening exercises that may help. It does make things a little challenging and can be painful. But luckily it usually resolves postpartum.
Let me start with Jake and Caleb's first days of school. Caleb is in first grade this year and has Miss Eliason. She is very sweet and kind and Caleb seems to like her. He is getting bored at times and seems to catch on to things rather swiftly. He gets a little frustrated that everything they are going over right now is stuff he has already learned. And for most students, I am sure they need the review--but Caleb seems to have this uncanny gift for remembering everything he sees, hears or reads and has just taken off with reading. I am continually amazed, humbled, grateful and in awe of his ability to recognize words that I don't think he should know like "veterinarian." He also has a knack for math. My challenge as his parent is to make sure he stays stimulated and interested in school so that he doesn't become lazy. As a former teacher I completely understand having to teach to the middle level of the class. And when you have over 26 students, how do you meet each child's needs? I've been pondering over this dilemma lately and am not sure what we will do for him, but for now, even though he gets a little frustrated that he knows most of what is being taught, he seems to thrive on the social aspect of school. He loves being with his friends and just being in the whole school environment.
Now, let's move on to Jake. He started preschool this year and seems to be doing well. He is beginning to recognize letters and numbers and enjoys going two days a week. Lately, he is absorbing the sign language the teacher is using. I think what is best about preschool is that Jake feels a little more grown-up and has his "own" thing that is not Caleb's or Michaela's. It's just for him. He is making friends outside of his family and that makes him feel more independent and important, too.
On to Michaela, you may laugh at this, but the single biggest accomplishment for her (and for me!) is that she is finally potty-trained. I know she isn't even three yet, and for those readers that are wondering why I say, "finally" it is because she initiated potty training well over a year ago and has stopped and started and made more messes on our carpet than Caleb, Jake and the dog combined! That is not exaggerating. I was happy to wait until she was past her third birthday, but she has gone through spurts of insisting on wearing underwear and then not wanting, to taking off her diaper, peeing on the floor, sometimes using the toilet sometimes just going in her diaper, then wanting underwear back on and so it has gone. And to those of you older women that told me that girls are supposed to be so much easier just flat out lied to me! I am a little bitter at you, ya know. My boys were sooooooooooooo much easier. And trying how to teach her not to get urine all over the seat and on the floor while she sits, yea, that has also thrown out the theory that boys make the toilet more messy, too.
Well, in spite of our struggle to potty train, it has probably made the victory that much more sweet because it has been a long road to travel.
Okay, what next, we have covered all the kids, perhaps you would like to hear how Mike is doing? He is loving AirMed, no surprise there. He got a little behind passing off training stuff when he went to D.C. for a two week HazMat course at the National Fire Academy, but he is about to pass everything off this next week and I know he will be very relieved when that gets done. I am very grateful that he is very motivated with his career and takes it very seriously and works extremely hard at what he does. I think he is fantastic at what he does. Sandy City Fire has also had some changes in the department and a few engineer slots have opened up. Hopefully, Mike will be able to promote in the next few months. We are not holding our breath--I am trying to say this politically correct here, let's just say the department seems to change their promotion policies and procedures more times than my daughter changes clothes in a day. Okay, that wasn't politically correct, but they haven't exactly been consistent over the time that Mike has been with them. Mike is very patient, however, and continues to work hard, and it will happen.
And last, we found out our fourth child will be a girl. Mike came up with the name "Emily Kathryn." It seems to fit, and that will probably be her name when she comes. She is growing well and so far we haven't had any complications. My pelvis began to separate during the last four weeks of Michaela's pregnancy and I was told this might be a problem again. It seems to have started in the last few weeks. I hope to continue doing core strengthening exercises that may help. It does make things a little challenging and can be painful. But luckily it usually resolves postpartum.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
The Kessel Family Talent Show
Tonight for family home evening (yes we are a day late), we learned about sharing our talents. Here is a video of our talent show. Hope you all enjoy! (By-the-way, Daddy was in D.C. at a HazMat course, we will have to add a video of one of his many talents at a later date.)
Friday, August 20, 2010
My thoughts on parenting
Tonight we had such a wonderful time with my side of the family. The occasion: to celebrate my nephew's fifth birthday. We played in the pool, ate too much pizza and cake, and had a grand time. Afterward, I had to go to the Dodge dealership to pick up our minivan that got serviced today. On the way home, somehow I was tuned in to KSL radio 1160 AM. Rarely do I listen to the radio and even more rarely, in fact, never, listen to AM radio. The evening talk show was based around this article published in the New York Magazine called, "All Joy and No Fun: Why Parents Hate Parenting" (http://nymag.com/news/features/67024/). On my solo drive back home, my mind was swirling, my emotions felt powerful and I really, really wanted to call in to the talk show and share. I didn't have my cell phone, left it with my husband by accident, so I was left to my thoughts. They kept getting stronger and I felt this emotional pressure that needed release. I stayed in our driveway for another five minutes to listen to the callers and hear what they had to say. I ran inside and gently forced my husband to hear what I desperately felt like I needed to get out, to release. First, I do not feel less happy now that I have children. Second, I do not feel like our marriage is more stressed now that we have children or that our marital bliss is much reduced since children entered the scene. And third, I am doing exactly what I have always wanted to be doing. While motherhood is painfully, gut wrenchingly hard, in fact, the hardest thing I have ever done, I would never, not in a split second, trade places with a woman who chose not to have children and lives a "happier, less stressful" life. My children do bring me joy, not just in the overarching scheme of things, but on a daily basis. While moment to moment I can't say I always feel inexpressible joy as I am mothering, I do on a daily basis feel pockets of joy throughout the 24 hour period. Today was a happier day than others, and other days can be miserable. The happiness of my day is usually based on my perspective and on my choices. It is how I chose to look at the situations I am faced with. Yes, it's hard when Jake has had little sleep and by the 20th whiny demand I have received by 10 AM, I am ready to stick him in his room and leave him there until dinner. That is where choice comes in. I feel joy when I find the inner strength to curb my tongue and my body to resist the urge to stick him in his room, but instead patiently and firmly say, "I would love to talk to you when you can talk sweet and nice." And walk away. I feel joy, when I can stop in a stressful moment such as when I catch my two year old spilling red nail polish all over the carpet and I lose my cool, and can come back and say to her, "I'm sorry mommy got angry. How are we going to clean this up?" And she throws her pudgy arms around me as I wipe her tears away and take her hand to find a rag and some cleaner. And of course, their are moments of joy that do not deal with my choice of thoughts and actions but just come from the personality and soul of each child. Like, the way Jake says things with a lisp, the way Michaela likes to be naked and run around the house (I just have to pinch her bum) and Caleb's smile and wacky sense of humor. I feel so strongly about my choice to be a mother, that I had to blog about it and get these feelings written down permanently.
I have to divert for a moment and address something the talk show host said. I can't quote him word for word, but I will summarize: He came from a family of seven children and thought that becoming a parent would be an easy transition for him. Yet, when they became parents, he was not prepared for the stress it put on their marriage and on their lives, basically how hard it was. I have to agree. The first two or three years of motherhood were not blissful for me. Caleb was a very difficult baby and I was not prepared for the demands a baby was going to put on me and on our marriage. And there were several days and weeks I would think, "Everyone out there that said parenthood was the most rewarding experience were LIARS!" I spent many nights crying. I wanted to go back to work and put Caleb in daycare because I felt like it would have been a lot easier to let someone else deal with his colicky behavior and I would only have to deal with it at night. But everytime I tried to do work out a plan to do this, I couldn't do it. My faith kept me going and Mike and I made it through. And we are BETTER people because of it. While life has seasons of peace, it also has seasons of turmoil that are beyond our control, but it is how we choose to respond to those tumultuous seasons that define us, that mold who we are. Mike and I could have had some tumultuous years in our marriage without children; he could have lost his job, for example, or contracted a debilitating illness. I could have spent many nights crying, then, too.
Well, it is time for me to go to bed and I need to end this post. I appreciate you readers bearing with me while I rant or express myself. It's nice to get it out how passionately I feel about something that is so dear to me. I feel like I have to stand up for motherhood, to defend a woman's choice to become a mother these days and even more for those that choose to stay at home. Yes, I feel like I have sacrificed my career, but I do not regret it. I sometimes yearn to be able to say, "I am a professor at such and such university" instead of, "I stay at home with our children." But that feeling is overpowered by the joy I feel from mothering and staying at home. I know I will never have this season of my life again. My goal is to try to seize the moments amidst some of the daily trudgery, and to often remember that what I am doing is far more important than any research I could be collecting or any lecture I could be giving.
Post edited:
After getting ready for bed, I realized I failed to mention a key ingredient to the joy I find in mothering and that is that I was blessed to find a man that is a good father, husband and provider and is my best friend. Without him, I could not have written the post I wrote above. I love him so very much and am brought to tears at times when I think how blessed I am to be married to him.
I have to divert for a moment and address something the talk show host said. I can't quote him word for word, but I will summarize: He came from a family of seven children and thought that becoming a parent would be an easy transition for him. Yet, when they became parents, he was not prepared for the stress it put on their marriage and on their lives, basically how hard it was. I have to agree. The first two or three years of motherhood were not blissful for me. Caleb was a very difficult baby and I was not prepared for the demands a baby was going to put on me and on our marriage. And there were several days and weeks I would think, "Everyone out there that said parenthood was the most rewarding experience were LIARS!" I spent many nights crying. I wanted to go back to work and put Caleb in daycare because I felt like it would have been a lot easier to let someone else deal with his colicky behavior and I would only have to deal with it at night. But everytime I tried to do work out a plan to do this, I couldn't do it. My faith kept me going and Mike and I made it through. And we are BETTER people because of it. While life has seasons of peace, it also has seasons of turmoil that are beyond our control, but it is how we choose to respond to those tumultuous seasons that define us, that mold who we are. Mike and I could have had some tumultuous years in our marriage without children; he could have lost his job, for example, or contracted a debilitating illness. I could have spent many nights crying, then, too.
Well, it is time for me to go to bed and I need to end this post. I appreciate you readers bearing with me while I rant or express myself. It's nice to get it out how passionately I feel about something that is so dear to me. I feel like I have to stand up for motherhood, to defend a woman's choice to become a mother these days and even more for those that choose to stay at home. Yes, I feel like I have sacrificed my career, but I do not regret it. I sometimes yearn to be able to say, "I am a professor at such and such university" instead of, "I stay at home with our children." But that feeling is overpowered by the joy I feel from mothering and staying at home. I know I will never have this season of my life again. My goal is to try to seize the moments amidst some of the daily trudgery, and to often remember that what I am doing is far more important than any research I could be collecting or any lecture I could be giving.
Post edited:
After getting ready for bed, I realized I failed to mention a key ingredient to the joy I find in mothering and that is that I was blessed to find a man that is a good father, husband and provider and is my best friend. Without him, I could not have written the post I wrote above. I love him so very much and am brought to tears at times when I think how blessed I am to be married to him.
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Mike's First AirMed Shift
Editor's Note: I tried to get Mike to write this post, but he proclaimed, "Kathryn, you are the chronologicaler in our household." Me, "You mean, I'm the historian?" "Yep." And he got up from the armchair in which I had him sequestered to take a nap.
Mike just returned from his first AirMed shift. It was in Rock Springs, Wyoming. What? You might be saying. But yes, they fly the whole crew from the Salt Lake City Airport to Rock Springs for 24 hours. He says they have a nice little apartment there, computers in every room with a pillowtop mattress on every bed.
They mostly do inter facility transports on a fixed wing 8 passenger airplane. At least I think that is what it is called. (And because Mike refuses to write this, he is just going to have to live with all the inaccuracies! :) ) When someone is being treated at the Rock Springs hospital, but needs more care than they can provide, AirMed transports them via an ambulance to the airport, shuttles them on the fixed wing to our airport and then transports them to the University of Utah hospital via ambulance for treatment. Mike's crew will then take a cab back to the SLC airport and fly back to Rock Springs.
When I asked Mike how he slept, his response, "Well, I tried to sleep, but I was just too excited, so I didn't get much rest." That's a big thing for Michael Timothy Kessel because this man can sleep anywhere at anytime and through just about anything.
It's nice for a wife to see her husband loving his job. As I stated in an earlier post, this job has been something Mike has worked hard for and has been yearning to get more than just about anything I have ever seen him want. He is a pretty content person, so to see him want something so bad and not get it the first time and then finally get it the second time around is very satisfying. And I also should say, that him getting this job has allowed or rather forced me to quit working from home and it's been wonderful!
Michaela sure misses her daddy when he's gone.
Mike just returned from his first AirMed shift. It was in Rock Springs, Wyoming. What? You might be saying. But yes, they fly the whole crew from the Salt Lake City Airport to Rock Springs for 24 hours. He says they have a nice little apartment there, computers in every room with a pillowtop mattress on every bed.
They mostly do inter facility transports on a fixed wing 8 passenger airplane. At least I think that is what it is called. (And because Mike refuses to write this, he is just going to have to live with all the inaccuracies! :) ) When someone is being treated at the Rock Springs hospital, but needs more care than they can provide, AirMed transports them via an ambulance to the airport, shuttles them on the fixed wing to our airport and then transports them to the University of Utah hospital via ambulance for treatment. Mike's crew will then take a cab back to the SLC airport and fly back to Rock Springs.
When I asked Mike how he slept, his response, "Well, I tried to sleep, but I was just too excited, so I didn't get much rest." That's a big thing for Michael Timothy Kessel because this man can sleep anywhere at anytime and through just about anything.
It's nice for a wife to see her husband loving his job. As I stated in an earlier post, this job has been something Mike has worked hard for and has been yearning to get more than just about anything I have ever seen him want. He is a pretty content person, so to see him want something so bad and not get it the first time and then finally get it the second time around is very satisfying. And I also should say, that him getting this job has allowed or rather forced me to quit working from home and it's been wonderful!
Isn't he just too sexy in this? Okay, maybe too much information,
but really...you can't deny how awesome he looks.
but really...you can't deny how awesome he looks.
Michaela sure misses her daddy when he's gone.Friday, August 13, 2010
Wildflowers!!!
Ahhh....just got back from Albion Bason in Little Cottonwood Canyon to see the wildflowers. Did you know that wildflower season in Utah is July through August? Never knew that. I always thought wildflowers bloomed whenever the snow melted and were here through... say September. And I didn't know there were ideal spots to look at wildflowers. But one day, since I don't work anymore, I was watching Studio 5, a local daily TV show and they had a spotlight on wildflower viewing. And wouldn't you know there is a little hike that is easy enough for kids (and a pregnant mother) just up Little Cottonwood Canyon. About an hours drive for us. I was also talking to my brother about it one day saying, "Yea, I'm just gonna take the kids up there next week. Mike is working so much I don't know when he can go, but the season is supposed to be over soon so I'm just gonna go with the kids. I've never gone and just looked at the wildflowers. The kids need to get out. It will be great exercise." Well, Nate had that day off, he loves adventure, so I invited him and their two kids along--Logan, 7 and Noah, almost 5. I must admit, I had a little bit of an alterior motive, I figured he might be willing to carry Michaela should she tucker out. (Shh...don't tell him...actually that really isn't why. But it worked out nice!) And it was everything I hoped it would be. Someone in our ward graciously loaned me an infant backpack (Thanks, Brianna!). And Nathan stoically carried Michaela most of the way up and all the way down. Of course, the two oldest kids were the ones complaining. Why is that? How is it that little Jake Jake can just plug along, enjoying being outside with bugs and flowers and dirt? But the 6 and 7 old year olds were the ones saying, "I'm soooo tired! How much longer??? You said this was going to be fun!" And then they would sprint ahead. And the six year old was saying on the drive home, "This was the best day!"???? Go figure. Right now I'm deliriously tired. The only thing that would have made today perfect would have been to have Mike with me. But, as he said, on our cell phone call home, "We'll have to go next year." Scroll down to see our picts.
Ah...sometimes brothers can be so sweet to each other.
Michaela just killed over and died the whole way down.
Noah on the left, Caleb, Jake and Logan. Taking a moment to rest.
The gang, sans me, at our tree where we ate our lunch.
See, the hike was relatively easy!
My camera does not do the wildflower scenery justice. So gorgeous!
Ah, Michaela. I could just squeeze her to bits.
The view at the top of the hike.
Ah...sometimes brothers can be so sweet to each other.
Michaela just killed over and died the whole way down.
Noah on the left, Caleb, Jake and Logan. Taking a moment to rest. 
The gang, sans me, at our tree where we ate our lunch.
See, the hike was relatively easy!
My camera does not do the wildflower scenery justice. So gorgeous!
Ah, Michaela. I could just squeeze her to bits. Monday, August 9, 2010
First detailed ultrasound
Today, as a family we got to watch our fourth child dance around on a computer screen while the ultrasound tech tried to take his/her length and head measurements. What an active little soul! The baby is about four inches long right now and has all five fingers, at least on one hand. He/she is measuring exactly on schedule--the due date, Feb. 15th, is now permanent. In 7 more weeks we will find out if our baby is a boy or girl. Something always happens to me when I see the baby on the monitor and hear the heartbeat. Of course, I've been dealing with the reality every day battling the nausea and fatigue, but to see his little squirming body always makes me tear up.
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